42 weeks

From the beginning I have found it a little confusing and more than a little annoying that the medical establishment has set a very specific (yet not specific to an individual) time schedule on fetal gestation. The idea that one counts the beginning of your pregnancy at a time when you're not even pregnant is just simply whack! I understand that it's for convenience sake. What bothers me about this is that by starting off on this footing it establishes the whole initial orientation towards pregnancy as that of "simply for convenience." Convenience then guides much of the following pre-natal, and delivery experience. How many other procedures, etc. are done to construct a seamless, predictable nature to pregnancy and delivery.

Where this really eats me up is in the fact that medical protocol now limits a baby's inutero development to 42 weeks. Now this is the 42 weeks measured that includes two weeks of bleeding and ovulating. And therefore, no baby. More and more of my friends are induced because they are given (how generous) 42 weeks to grow and deliver a baby. Now we all know that children develop outside the womb distinctly. Some talk sooner than others, walk later, grow teeth, potty train, and on and on. But ALL fetuses are to develop the same. See, I just don't buy it.

As I round corner after corner of this pregnancy I realize the pressure I feel always comes from trying to meet some expectation of the established normal pregnancy timeline. By such and such date the nucal fold should be this small, kidneys this big but no bigger, placenta this high, weight this much, labor starts by this time, cervix opens at this rate, and on and on...

How can folks still be trying to reign in nature, and such an entirely natural process? I am healthy, and if all is fine with the baby. Let the baby guide this process. At what point can I begin to trust this new being? I believe this individual will do what is best for both of us, even now. Conditions are good for both of us right now and yet there will arrive a time when it will be time to change, as in all things. And change will arrive and we will go with it. Rushing things feels so completely counter-intuitive. And inevitably to more and more medical intervention.

I am not rigid about my birth experience, in fact I have no expectations. We still don't even know if I will be invited to birth at the birthing center, or if I am high risk and will need a cesarean. But I do know there's a perverse need to try and work the system, squeeze out one extra day to my due date. I'm trying to use all methods available to get on the baby's timeline. I am nearly 28 weeks since my last period but this little being has only been growing for just over 25.

Already this infant is under pressure to deliver results at someone else's demands.